"yes, i understand that every life must end..."
but i don't understand why some lives have to end on such an awful note. and i guess i don't understand why half of the stuff i've written in the last 2 years has been about scott. is this my way of coping? or am i stuck in a moment, two years ago, standing next to his hospital bed. "stuck in a moment that you can't get out of.." because i know that it still haunts me. in a few weeks, it will have been exactly two years since that day. february 13. the day before valentine's day. how horrible is that? my poor mom...it's like, "oh hey, happy valentine's day...sorry about your husbands' death."
and that's not even that bad, compared to what scott had to go through. how many times have i written about this? how many more times will i write about it in the future? and when will i be able to think about it without my whole mood completely changing? time heals all wounds? i'm really not so sure about that.
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