when it is not your place to speak, how do you go about speaking? must you hold your tongue? and for how long? how do you discover what you really want in life? and how do you prevent the urge to just sit there and cry and wish that the most perfect person in the world for you will burst through your door and wipe away your tears?

and for how long must we live in fairy tales?

when will reality be enough?

and when will i be able to consider myself grown? do i even want to consider myself grown? ...i guess that's the question i should be asking first.

self-discovery is difficult.
i'm so unsure of so many things.
and i want to shout it out to the world...but at the same time, i don't want to say a word to anyone.

[insert heavy sigh here]

i am happy. i promise. i just want more. i want more out of life. i want more out of everything.


no more blogs today...this is getting ridiculous.